Has it really been 11 days?!  Hm.  I suppose so.  To my credit, I did write a draft halfway in between that I was seconds away from publishing until my better judgment stopped me from defaming my dearest That Boy on the internet out of anger.  Justified anger, but anger regardless.

Then, I really didn’t have anything else to say that didn’t somehow link to that situation in my angry brain, so like our Kindergarten teachers told us, I couldn’t say anything at all.

Let me catch you up …

A friend of mine is campaigning for the state house of representatives.  A long, long time ago in a hot van somewhere between NYC and MI, a conversation was had by a group of college friends.  It was all about big dreams and sweet changes and how we’d do shit our own (coooool) way if we were ever to run and/or be elected to office.  We were (um, are) political science nuts so this conversation was much preferable to us discussing reality television or the Yankees.

In the course of those hours of talking big talk we all promised we’d be there if anyone ever grew the cajones to walk the big walk.  Fast forward to now (uh … 5 years later?  I don’t exactly recall.) and low and behold, one of us got his shit together enough to do it.  That means drop everything and help run a campaign so we can fulfill our promises, laugh hysterically about the people that answer the door during neighborhood canvassing, and if we’re lucky, screw around in the spinny chairs at the State Capitol some day.

We’ve matured so much in five years.

Then, of course, there’s other news.  I went to work yesterday (high school kid job) for a meeting with next year’s potential new and returning students.  That meeting went well.  We had a staff meeting afterward where someone was kind enough to tell me (after knowing for 2 full fricking weeks) that the school board is proposing a change to the payscale I fall under.  Change.  Hm.  I mean, I guess, the state is broke and they’re passing on that broke-ness to the schools, so it makes some sense that they need to change things up a little.

Except, they’re proposing a change to my payscale that changes it from “not a whole lot, gosh we should give that girl a gold star for feeding a family and keeping the lights on with it” to $0.

?!??!

Yea, you read that right.  ZERO F’IN DOLLARS.  And of course, the school would never “ask me to work for free” so they’re quintessentially telling me I volunteer to work there for nothing or my program is canceled.  Done.  Goodbye.  Sorry.

Great.

Awesome.

The best news I’ve ever heard.

(/eye rolling bitter ass sarcasm)

That’s a lot to swallow.  I’ve been at this particular school for 5 years.  I’ve been doing this particular job for at least 8.  My kids gain so much from their participation, I can’t even explain it.  They go to law school.  They become doctors.  They get full ride scholarships.  They stop acting like idiot children and start thinking like non-window licking adults.  It’s amazing.  There’s huge bang for your buck as far as my minuscule paycheck and program budget are concerned.  I dare anyone to get the same impact for the same money.  It can’t be done.

The best part?

The athletic coaches are excluded from this proposed payroll change.

Are you kidding me?!

Are you telling me the kid that dicks around playing mediocre golf for two seasons gets more from that experience academically than my state champion policy debaters?

I don’t think so.

But of course, athletics always get their way.  For no real reason.  It’s not even like the athletic teams at this school are any good.  They win occasionally.  Sometimes.  I mean, they’re not world class or state renowned or fricking magic.  They’re … alright.  Mediocrity buys you a new stadium and a special pass to keep on spending as much money as you please while excellence kills your program.

Shit.

Now, lest you think it’s all doom and gloom, the board hasn’t made a final decision yet.  There’s still time to rally my alumni and parents and go make a toddler tantrum scene at the meeting in June when they’re making the decisions.  It’s on like Donkey Kong now.  I will fight for these kids and this program and my job until they have to drag me off someone if necessary.

There’s a storm brewin’, y’all.  I’ll keep you posted.  If you think your kid goes to my school, I’d love to have to tell the board how much you love and adore me (and my not working for zero dollars).  If you have any muy bueno legal advice, bring it on.  If you could start saving your quarters in case I end up locked up for my shenanigans, I’d much appreciate it.

Em.

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